Just came back from pistol camp yesterday. It was quite interesting. We did most of the training bit on the first day. We, the seniors, imparted our knowledge to the juniors. The funny thing was that I when I heard everything that we had to do in order to shoot well, I realised that I didn't do most of it. I gripped too hard, I can't get my standing position right, I didn't lock my wrist, I seldom followed through etc. Ah...oh no. Haha. Must work on those after NUS invitational. Then at night, we did the "missing person" trick on the juniors to see how they would react. And now I think that I'm more settled about my juniors. At first I was worried that they might not bond well together, but now, I'm quite happy that they can interact quite well together.

Slept at about 4 or 5am that night even though the lights were out at 3. I slept on the floor in my sleeping bag next to kim and the rest slept on tables. Couldn't sleep cos I wasn't really used to such a high pillow (used my bag) and also cos I was coughing. Tried not to cough so often cos didn't want to wake the rest. Then there was one time I forgot and couldn't help coughing for a few seconds. Then suddenly I felt kim patting my arm...like how you would pat a friend's back when he/she coughs. Haha...was quite surprised and touched. Didn't know when I fell asleep cos I didn't dream that night. Woke up just before 8 the next morning.

Felt a little dulled throughout the next day. During the mini competition, I shot horribly. Didn't even have any sort of a grouping. Was very nervous cos I only had fifteen minutes to shoot twenty shots. Wanted to kick myself into oblivion after that. I think that when I'm not in my comfort zone...dirty and sleep-deprived, I'll feel extremely miserable. Haha. Sleep is important. I'll have to take my hat off to those who can survive with less than 6 hours of sleep night after night. Cos I'll just go crazy.

Well, slept for 11 hours last night. Made up a bit for the previous night. But I still felt like I needed to sleep more today. Was out for almost the whole day. Went to train, then went for tuition and drum lessons. And had to study for bio spa at 9 something when I came home today. Bah. I just want to hide somewhere nice and comfortable to sleep for 2 months or so. It's not good to have your days packed, day after day. No time to study or do homework this week. Starting to worry a little for my common test... Don't want Mr lee to talk to me about my results again.

And NUS invitational is just two days away. Ok...one an a half days away. Did I mention that I've meddled with my trigger more than 10-15 times in the past week? Blah. I really hope that I can get above 355 this time. But I'm starting to doubt myself. That is quite dangerous. I must make every shot perfect, and yet keep within the time limit. Blah. Time.

Why must I shoot well? Because that's what I invest my time in. So if I don't do it well, then it's like... argh. I want to prove to myself that I can actually be good at something. Succeed in something.

Fight on.